Bedridden

I've been there lately ..  My mom is going through some serious health issues currently.  My wife recently had surgery, making our bed her favorite location for six weeks.  It sucks . You're miserable.  And the best sometimes comes out of others because of it.

I remember when I lost a friend to Cancer about 10 years ago.  I rarely visited him or went out of my way to stop in.  In all fairness we weren't that tight, but that wasn't the issue. I was uncomfortable with the situation.  After he passed away, I have to admit it bothered me I didn't stop in and see him more. Guilt set in.   When I lost my older sister to Cancer , I went through the same guilt pattern; why didn't' I go to Mississippi more often to visit?   Of course I did visit ( never often enough ) , but also didn't realize we'd lose her as soon as we did.  Now I'm dealing with something similar with my mom.  I'm on a business trip as I type this, back in 2 days, then have an appointment on Monday further delaying my visit.  At that point , I'll be in a vehicle headed to Arkansas to visit.  I guarantee she's wondering where I am. She's not terminal, but at age 77, health isn't the best, her bout with pneumonia can't be taken lightly.

Which brings me around to my  'thought of the day' for typing this.  When we are sick, injured, bed ridden for a period of time, we find out whom really cares. I"m using my wife's situation as an example. It suddenly becomes apparent whom really cares.  Who asks how she's doing.  Who comes to visit.  Who sends cards.  Whom texts her or emails her.  Whom calls her.  It's gotten very interesting to see who the true inner circle of friends is , and whom is on the outer circle of friends.

Maybe it's the way we've evolved as a society.  I guess if you click 'Like"  on someone's Facebook status or comment "get well soon" you've done your duty?   Not the way I see it now.  Hell, I tend to be one of those usually!  However, when you are on the inside looking out, you get a different perspective.   I pray I remember this when people around me need my support that I care about.  Like my mom.   As soon as I'm back in Texas I need to plan a trip to Arkansas to visit.  Maybe send more flowers this week.  Maybe I'll find a card today and send it her way .  I wish I was there hugging her right now, but , not an option.

From my wife's perspective, when she got a card from a friend of ours in Arkansas it meant the world to her ( does anyone even send cards anymore?) ! When she gets a call asking  how she is doing,  she lights up .  When her sister flew down to see her, you know she lit up!    She hasn't said anything, but I know it means a lot to her when her friends stop by, called, texted , emailed, sent cards... something.  I know I've keyed on who has, hasn't .. and whom has pretty much ignored it all. Sort of been an eye opener for me and hope I learn from it. I know if my friends become injured , seriously sick or bedridden in the future, I'll make that lil extra effort.

It matters.